The Troofa bout the Garra Rufa

 

 

The Garra Rufa have arrived

To eat your body flesh alive...

 

Garra Rufa, Garra Rufa

Just ideal for you if you've a

Foot or two that need some eatin'

Garra Rufa need some meat in-

Side their little fishy tummies

Toe flesh, heel flesh, yummy, yummy

 

Garra Rufa, Garra Rufa

Predatory, piscine pedicural trooper

Please don't be a party pooper

The Foot Spa's doing a bargain two-fer-

One if you can bring a friend

They'll forage round your body end

 

Garra Rufa, Garra Rufa

You've no need to use a loofah

They'll nibble on your new verruca

And gorge on ageing hardened corns

And other growths your body spawns

A coolly callous callus feeder

A bold bloodthirsty little bleeder

A puss-filled manky festering bunion

Is to him like cheese and onion

 

Garra Rufa, Garra Rufa

Just where do they do a poo? Per-

Haps they do it on your skin

And then eat it all up again

 

What elsa do Garra Rufa eat

Apart from ankles, toes and feet

In their natural habitat?

Plants or plankton, seaweed, sprat?

 

(sing to the tune of "Hare Krishna" by John Lennon and the Plastic Ono Band)

Garra Rufa, Garra Rufa,

Super dooper, Garra Rufa

 

But just watch out you Foot Spa goers

As you are dangling your toe...(ers)

In the softly lapping water

Be beware, beware you oughta

Keep a wary, scary eye

Though they may seem like just small fry

Last Wednesday in the shopping mall

A Garra Rufa and his pal

A mutant, near-extinct piranha

(Just shipped in from Dutch Guyana)

Possessing quite an appetite

Ate my big toe with just one bite

 

So...be beware the Garra Rufa

Or you may lose a part of you...fer

The greedy gobbling, gluttonous Garra Rufa

Will do fer...you